An Alice-esque Mistake
by MuMuSquared
Summary: The best laid plans of sake and fuuin-jutsu often go awry. All Naruto ever wanted was to create a simple explosive tag. Who could've guessed that messing up a few lines on a seal while drunk could go so wrong... femNaruto x Shisui
1. Party Hard Til You Fall Backwards

**Author's Note: This is an AU where Sasuke was killed fighting the Juubi. Tsuki: We...just don't want to have to deal with his character at the moment...Sorry. Ruka: Sasuke is DEAD DEAD DEAD DEAD DEAD DEAD DEAD, deader than the dinosaurs (FYI he's dead, just in case you didn't get the message yet). Tsuki: Jeez, harsh much.**

 **Disclaimer: We do not own Naruto.**

* * *

Chapter 1: Party Hard Til You Fall Backwards

"To Neji, to Sasuke, to Shikaku, to Inoichi, to all the fallen comrades who could not join us today..." Tsunade began solemnly to the hushed crowd, holding up her sake cup in a toast. There was a whooshing as thousands of Konoha shinobi raised their arms in unison. There was an audible silence as many of the shinobi paused, caught up in their personal memories of the fallen, before they downed their sake in one gulp, as if swallowing all the bad memories at once. Tsunade, herself, poured her entire bottle down her mouth and let out a hearty sigh, cheeks flushing.

"Now that the solemnities are over with, let's hear some goddamn good news for a change, " Tsunade roared to a rapidly stiffening crowd. "We won this long and hard war. We're survivors! The Will of Fire still burns strong and it will continue..uhhh...to do so as long as there are leaves...err...children! And now, I am proud to announce my successor." Her arms came up in a wide sweeping arc as she said this before pointing to a tall, lanky man. The man in question looked up at her with a tired eye as if already regretting what will happen next. "Hatake Kakashi, elite jounin of Konohagakure!" Kakashi gave a sad little slump of the shoulders as he grieved for the loss of his freedom. He slowly made his slouching way to the podium that Tsunade was standing. Impatient groans and huffs responded to the already familiar antics. Several thoughts drifted through the minds of the watching shinobi at this point: _We're going to have to deal with_ this _for kami knows how long?_ or _Konoha is going to_ drown _in overdue paperwork._ or _Will we ever get_ anything _done with this guy running the village?!_

Kakashi turned to the crowd after accepting the traditional white and red Hokage hat. He held it in his hand briefly. His hands lowered slightly at the weight as if burdened by the heavy decisions and consequences made and experienced by the great people who wore the hat before. There was only one thing that Kakashi could think of at the current moment: _Whoever made this decision was definitely drunk and not right of mind. And considering Tsunade and her drinking habits...maa..._ Reluctantly, he put the hat on. His figure was unrecognizable to many of the shinobi who only knew him by his iconic hairstyle. It did seem to many though, as the sun came out from behind the clouds, that the presences of the previous Hokages could be seen standing next to Kakashi.

There was a great outcry of cheers as shinobi concentrated on the good news in front of them and swept the terrible memories to the back of their minds. Naruto, in particular, gave a loud whoop before exclaiming, "Keep that hat warm for me, Kakashi-sensei! I'm going to take it from you soon, dattebayo!" It went relatively unheard within the onslaught of noise, but her pink-haired companion punched the noisy kunoichi into the ground with mock irritation.

"That huuurt, Sakura." The blonde whined.

* * *

Later that night, Konoha was alit with bonfires as shinobi partied with all their might. After an arduous war, it was only right that they relax now that there is peace, however temporary it may be. Naruto watched the firelight cast dancing shadows around her. She clasped her cup between both hands, and observed the merriment before her with only a wisp of a smile. Her mind was a million miles away, lost in the memories of the past few years. So much had changed since she was a genin. People had died, people had mourned, but most importantly, people had adapted to these new situations. She let out a low sigh. People can't help but change, but Naruto sometimes wanted to freeze time and relieve the weights that life continually piled down onto her. An affectionate punch on her shoulder interrupted her mulling, and Naruto looked to the culprit. Kiba gave her an understanding smile and motioned to her still full sake cup.

"You're not one to sulk, Naruto." Akamaru barked his agreement and rested a paw on Naruto's head. Said girl let out an exaggerated huff and expression before letting both taper off into a somber silence.

"It's not exactly easy you know," She began softly. "So many people that we know and love are gone while we're still..alive. I can't stop thinking about them; the laughs, the smiles, even the petty little fights that we get into sometimes. Sometimes, it gets to be too much. I can't just forget them, but I can't think about them either. They won't ever, _ever_ come back, and I can't stand it! I couldn't bring him back to Konoha! He was going to, too and I let him die!" Her voice rose by the end of her sentence and broke off into an uncomfortable silence. Akamaru gave a sympathetic whine and rested his head onto her arm.

Kiba sighed. He was never very good with these situations. _If only Hinata were here.._ But she wasn't, so he had to find a way to break Naruto out of this angsty haze. He awkwardly ruffled Naruto's hair as he spoke. "This is why we have nights like these. We can forget our worries for a bit and let loose so we can bounce back the next day." Blue eyes considered the statement. "So what do ya say?" Kiba raised his sake cup.

After a few moments of hesitation, Naruto's glass clinked against it. "What the heck." She said with renewed vigor. _It's just this one night at the very least after all._ Naruto grinned and downed the full cup in one go.

"That's the spirit!" Kiba laughed heartily as he refilled their cups from a nearby bottle.

It was Naruto's first time drinking this much. Not even her oath exchange with Gamabunta involved this much sake. She didn't realize that Konoha even had this much sake. She could feel the heady rush and warmth that signaled that she was way past the tipsy stage and very close to just being dead drunk. Regardless, egged on by Kiba and Lee, she threw back another cup before letting out a loud, satisfied "pwah". The Konoha 11 laughed heartily with one another, having gravitated toward each other as time passed.

"You know what this party needs?" Ino slurred in her drunken stupor, "Fireworks!"

Shino answered in an even tone, the little pauses in between his words the only sign of his drunkenness, "We don't have any fireworks..and I doubt Hokage-sama..will sign off on releasing them to us when we're all this drunk. The only feasible solution is to..substitute fireworks with explosive tags. It would mimic the loud bang well enough."

Everyone put their cups down before fiddling around in their pockets looking for ink, paper, and a brush pen. Luckily, Sai had plenty for everyone. They all plopped down on the ground and started inking explosion seals. Naruto, in particular, sat Indian-style and as she held her pen to the paper, she realized that she could hardly distinguish between the marks she made. _Oh well...what's the worst that could happen?_ She gave a happy little shrug and hum before continuing on what she presumed to be the best explosion seal that would ever grace the Elemental Nations. The rest of the Konoha 11 were eager to see the results of Naruto's work. After all, she was a member of a clan lauded for their inherent sealing expertise.

Finishing off her seal with an elaborate whirl around the rest of the lines, Naruto whipped the brush in the air. She stood abruptly and brushed the dust of her jumpsuit, holding the seal out for everyone to see.

Shikamaru felt a nudging in the back of his head as he contemplated the seal Naruto held out for display. _That doesn't look like an explosion seal...there are one too many whorls, loops, and spirals._ But in his drunken state of mind, he was in no position to act upon his subconscious thought. _Troublesome_. He watched as Naruto began charging up her chakra. An ominous feeling began dissipating the previous good cheer from the alcohol and festivities.

There was a loud poof sound as Naruto was swallowed up by a huge cloud of smoke. Highly trained shinobi as they were, the Konoha 11 (now 10) thought nothing of it and dismissed it as a failed explosion tag, until the smoke cleared and they realized that there was no sunny blonde heroine standing in the midst of it.

The End.

* * *

 **AN: This is written by two high school seniors who are procrastinating on their college apps :)**


	2. Falling Down the Rabbit Hole into Neverl

**AN: Ruka- We've reached 5 followers! So here's a present ;) Tsuki- Yeah...We may or may not update this quickly… We'll have to see. Hopefully we can though~**

 **Ruka- More positive feedback= faster updates. Do have 3+4 done tho.**

 **Tsuki: Dunno if there's actually a correlation...but reviews and follows and favorites do give encouragement to keep going!**

* * *

Chapter 2: Falling Down the Rabbit Hole into Neverland

Naruto blinked her stinging eyes against the dim lighting. She felt like her senses had been steamrolled and then tossed into a blender. She groaned and struggled to calm her spinning head. Everything felt wrong, especially in this unfamiliar place. A strong smell of decay and blood hit her still sharp nose. _So you're finally up, brat._ A voice growled, rattling Naruto's already frazzled mind. "That hurts you stupid fox..." She muttered in irritation. She could feel him swishing his tails with annoyance and decided not to elaborate on her present feelings. _Then perhaps you should not have drunk a lake's worth of sake before writing a haphazard and unstable seal, you stupid human!_ Naruto flinched as the fox's voice grew with each word he threw at her mind. "Right, right, don't get drunk anymore. Got it." She quickly agreed with her tenant before her mind simply imploded from her sensory overload. "Mind telling me what happened?"

 _Hmph._ _You and the other kits decided that setting off explosive tags would be a great idea, so you decided to create some homemade ones._ Naruto's eyes widened slightly. "Oh no...don't tell me I blew something up and landed myself in prison alone! It was Shino's idea so he should be here." She huffed indignantly. _Don't think too highly of yourself. The situation would be much simpler if it was_ merely _a simple explosion._ She frowned at this and tried to remember what exactly had happened to no avail. At least Kurama's chakra was slowly driving away the effects of the hangover so she could think clearer. She tried to pull herself up to a sitting position only to find that she was chained to the ground and her chakra had been suppressed with seals. Realizing the gravity of the situation, she needed answers and fast. "What happened?"

 _I was just getting to that._ The Kyuubi's chakra flared slightly from his impatient nature. _I believe that the seal you made has sent you to the past_. _I don't know how far back yet, but I can sense the presence of another me here. Oh yes, and because of your lack of forethought, the seal was overloaded with chakra and disintegrated once it did its job._

Naruto's mouth gaped open as her mind tried to process this bombshell of information. _What the hell?_

* * *

Naruto stumbled around unsteadily, muttering incoherently and occasionally giggling at a joke that only she had heard. The townspeople around her shied away and sent the clearly drunk girl the oddest looks. Blonde hair whipped back and forth with her strange dance of movements down the path. Debilitated by her blurry vision, she veered off the dirt road and walked headfirst into a tree. She leaned against it without moving for a bit, before hearing loud shouting and crashing glass that left her ears ringing. Despite her state of mind, she was able to identify the trouble before her.

"Oy! Whatt'ya think yer doin, bein sooo noisy?!" Naruto yelled in the general direction she heard the sounds from as she stumbled past the tree and nearly fell over. _Very nice first impression, kit._ The Kyuubi growled sarcastically, as he impatiently waited for the girl to sober up eventually.

"Oh shaddap you stupid fuzzball." She grumbled back. _I'm going to pretend that I heard nothing since your mental state is compromised at the moment._ Kurama's eyes flashed angrily with carefully controlled rage. "Fuzzball! Fuzzball! Fuzzball!" Naruto sang annoyingly off key. _Shut up and go save them already!_ Any more of this drunken Naruto was going to push Kurama over the edge of sanity. "Oh yah! Whazz goin on over there..." Naruto slurred while squinting in the direction.

Through her blurry vision, she was able to identify an old couple shrinking back fearfully against the walls of a small teashop. A group of younger shinobi had the couple trapped. Most were focused on their 'conversation', though some glanced in her direction. They didn't perceive her as a threat, but it was hard to ignore the drunken girl. "Heey! Leave 'em alone!" This caught the attention of the rest of the group, and they turned to face her, annoyance coloring their glares.

* * *

"Was nice while it lasted," mourned Chika-baachan, "Bin a real long time since we've had any protection." The elderly lady was hunched over as she served a man who could have been her son's age. She gripped her serving tray tightly to her chest as she observed her customer. He was a tall man with spiky white hair held back by a hitai-ate and dressed with a geta. The man cradled his tea cup as he brought it up to his mouth. He blew gently across the surface of the tea.

After taking a sip, the man murmured, "What happened?" The question was asked casually enough that the old lady didn't think much about his intentions. She had a pretty positive outlook on foreign shinobi now. Maki-chan was an amazing and kind kunoichi even when drunk.

"A group of young 'uns from Oto came by ta demand 'protection' money. Business bin real slow lately. There ain't been nearly as many visitors as there used ta be," with this, the old lady peered over her serving tray to look at the customer suspiciously, "Ya shinobi, ain't ya? Ya here for Maki-chan?"

"Maki-chan…" the customer said in an unobtrusive manner, "Yes, we had arranged to meet here at this teashop. You've met her?" He continued, "Perhaps she mentioned me? My name is Jiraiya." The man, now revealed to be Jiraiya, slid a wad of bills across the table. "A tip."

Chika-baachan hurriedly picked up the money and shoved it into her sleeves. "She made no mention of ya. But the entire time she was here, she was drunker than my husband on a weekend night."

"She's the protection you mentioned? And she is no longer here anymore?"

"She stumbled out from behind a tree, swaying from side ta side. She prolly heard the commotion. The Oto-nin were shattering cups and plates everywhere. Was a terrifying experience. I was afraid that them sluggers would kill jii-chan and myself for not having the dough."

"She saved you."

"A flash of yellow, that 'un was. She appeared almost instantly behind the leader of the group and dealt a swift blow ta the back of his neck. She then did this swirly move and knocked the other two shinobi out too. It was ahmazing. At the time, I ain't knowing what her intentions was 'sides knocking out them Oto-nin. I shivered some in fear when the most ahmazing thing happened. She turned that pretty face of hers towards me and gave me the most brilliant smile I've seehn in years of living in this dump of a country. 'twas so bright; I felt like I was staring into the sun personified.

When she started talking, I could tell she ain't sober. She slurred them words together. Real lost damsel that 'un was, much confused but much willing tah help. I asked if she would be a real dear and help save the other town shop owners from them terrorizing Oto-nin. She agreed real easily and bounded off over them rooftops. I hurriedly chased after the gal on the road. By the time I caught up to her, I saw Maki-chan being thanked by dozens of other villagers and off by the road, a 'hole buncha pass'd out Oto-nin."

"And where is she now?"

"Tak'n by that nutty leader of them Oto-nin, real scary that 'un. A real pasty guy if I eva saw one. Pastier than jii-chan's wrinkly ass. He came in here all mean and scary, demanding ta see Maki-chan. Seemed like Maki-chan recognized him, though real drunk she was. She went with him easy but I heard them sounds of battle. Metal clashing and all that. By then it got real quiet and I mustered that courage to go out, there was no one there."

"You mean they left together? Or was she defeated by the man?"

"I have none idea. My job's justa serve tea to ya customers."

"Describe the man please."

"Pay up. Without Maki-chan ta protect us from the next-round of collections, I gotta make some dough."

Reluctantly, Jiraiya rifled through his shirt to pull out another wad of ryo before throwing it on the desk. He looked at Chika-baachan expectedly. "This had better be some good info…."

* * *

The soft echoes of quiet footsteps snapped Naruto out of her stupor. Regardless of where, or when, she was, she still needed to be on guard. As the footsteps neared, she paled slightly. There was a distinct scent of snakes. And if this really was the past, then this was no friendly visit.

* * *

Orochimaru strode down the hallways of one of his Oto lab. His sandaled feet made no sound as he padded along. He was heading towards a rather curious subject, one that he had captured just the day before. He approached a blocky seal-painted door. _The strongest suppression seals for the unknown, of course._ Flicking his blood onto the seal, he watched as the seal activated and the door unlocked. Orochimaru placed his hand on the doorknob, stilling his face into what he prided as his most frightening face. _It is show time._

He stepped into the room with all the grace of a lethal predator, only to see that the girl was glaring at him unabashedly. The look in her eyes was fierce. She was not afraid of him. Not afraid of him, Orochimaru! One of the strongest shinobi alive in her presence, yet she showed no fear.

Orochimaru leered. This girl would be worth breaking. He thought back to his first meeting with her. Even incapacitated, she was a worthy kunoichi to incorporate into his Sound Four.

* * *

"Interesting..." Orochimaru mused quietly to himself while he observed the unconscious pile of his Oto nin. He prodded one of the snoring bodies with the edge of Kusanagi, annoyed when the man didn't wake up immediately. The tip of the blade cut into the Oto nin's flesh, and the man started awake with a howl. "Report." The snake man hissed dangerously. The threat of an extremely painful death hung in the air without needing to be said. The man gulped and quickly stuttered out his story. "Interesting..." Orochimaru mused again before piercing the man's throat and leaving him gurgling away his last bits of life.

Loud laughter emanated from the small tea shop. It was a foreign sound in these parts, and Orochimaru immediately knew that he had found his target. A smirk found its way onto his lips. This girl would make an excellent subject, and he would enjoy breaking that mirth. He entered the building and grinned at the tensing of the atmosphere. "I'm here for the little lady over there." He demanded smoothly. The old couple exchanged a worried glance. The blonde turned to him, about to shout, but froze when she saw his face. Her facial features formed a grim mask, though Orochimaru could still pinpoint the specks of anger in her blue eyes.

"Fine." The word was surprisingly steady, and startled the old couple more than her loud arrival.

"Maki-chan..." Chika-baachan put her hand on the blonde's shoulder in an attempt to stop her. The girl grinned brightly while removing the hand gently.

"I'll be a'ight!" Despite the sunny smile, there was an intensity there that Chika-baachan knew not to get in the way of.

"Stay safe Tema-kun." The old man held his wife close as they watched the two shinobi exit their shop.

Once the two were outside, the blonde quickly put distance between her and Orochimaru and put her hands in a familiar hand seal. A small horde of sunny hair glinted in the light. If this is what the girl could do when she was drunk, then the potential that she could have when sober... "Interesting." Orochimaru's smirk grew as he drew his faithful blade.

* * *

"You've been very helpful, old lady. I'll be sure to recommend any travelers I see to your teahouse." Jiraiya stood up, sweeping away the dust from his clothes. He grabbed his pack from the bench next to him and slung it over his shoulder before walking out of the store.

* * *

A low chuckle emanated from the figure proceeding toward Naruto's cell. Cruel eyes settled on the frozen kunoichi. "Hello there, young lady." The pale man hissed with a chilling smile plastered on his face. Too many questions filled Naruto's mind at once before she settled on one. _When_ exactly _is this?_

* * *

 _So a mysteriously powerful kunoichi appears out of nowhere wearing a shinobi character engraved hitai-ate and is then kidnapped by Orochimaru. What village uses such a hitai-ate? Also, a kunoichi that powerful with looks that striking should be pretty well-known, yet she is not in any of the bingo books._

"There is something odd going on. For a powerful kunoichi described as a "flash of yellow" to appear in Orochimaru's territory, visibly drunk or drugged, and then be taken. What could this mean?" Jiraiya muttered to himself as he hopped from tree limb to tree limb.

He stopped on a particularly thick branch before biting his thumb and flicking his hand out. He rapidly formed handsigns to perform the summoning jutsu. Kosuke appeared in a puff of smoke.

"Hey Jiraiya! What's up?" Kosuke hopped onto his summoner's shoulder. Jiraiya quickly pulled out an empty scroll and a pen.

"I need you to deliver this to Sarutobi-sensei. It's an urgent message. It has to do with Orochimaru," Jiraiya rapidly scribbled on the scroll before sealing it up and tossing it gently at Kosuke. The toad snapped it out of the air with his tongue before saying a muffled "Got it!". He disappeared in another puff of smoke.

Jiraiya looked forward into the darkness of the forest he was in and narrowed his eyes. _I'm coming for you, Orochimaru. No experiment of yours will stop me._


	3. Tracking Down Alice

**AN: Ruka- Sorry for the short chapter.**

Chapter 3: Tracking Down Alice

 **Urgent Missive for the Hokage (Received via toad summon 13:47) :**

Sarutobi-sensei,

Browsing for rice. Found a snake in one of the bags. Snake had mouse in mouth. Not good. Where do you recommend I go to next for shopping?

Rice Supplier

* * *

Sarutobi sighed, expelling a cloud of grey smoke. He flickered his chakra minutely and immediately, the ANBU hiding in the room dropped into existence. The ANBU crouched subserviently, grunting, "How may I serve, Hokage-sama?"

"The missive was from Jiraiya. He tracked down Orochimaru to Rice Country. It appears my wayward student has founded his own shinobi village of missing-nin and criminals and has been terrorizing the civilians of Rice Country for years.

Jiraiya found a person of interest. It seems like there is a chance that Orochimaru managed to abandon Konoha with some of Minato's DNA-" Sarutobi was interrupted by the ANBU.

"You don't mean-?"

"A blonde girl was running away from Orochimaru. He eventually captured her. The civilian Jiraiya talked to described the way she moved in a fight as flashes of yellow. Does that not remind you of our own Yellow Flash?"

* * *

Coming out of his recollections, Orochimaru discovered that the girl's glare had not lessened one bit. Amused by the defiance, Orochimaru let out an ominous chuckle. Bringing his hands together, he cracked his knuckles while staring into her eyes. _Crack. Crick. Criiiiiiiiick._ His tongue slid out of his mouth, tasting the blood in the air. The rich iron taste was accompanied by a coppery scent. The blonde's blood was delicious.

Orochimaru slithered forward, his right hand lifting up slightly. As he stood in front of the kneeling, chained girl, he brought his hand up to gently caress the girl's scarred cheeks. The girl paled slightly, her eyes wider but still determined. There still was no fear in her eyes. Orochimaru pulled his hand back slightly and abruptly slapped the girl. Her head ricocheted off the cave wall. A trail of fresh blood flowed down her temple.

"Pretty little thing aren't you?" the words flowed out of his mouth like sweetened honey. _Ah..._ Orochimaru thought happily, _there is that glint of fear now…_ Orochimaru smothered the thought. With an emotionless expression on his face, he circled the girl. The girl coughed a little before spitting at Orochimaru. The wad of spit landed on the floor as Orochimaru took a step back from it. _The girl dares?_

He opened his mouth wide and stuck his hand down his throat, pulling out Kusanagi. His hand did not shake, it remained in the air confidently as he approached the girl again. He noticed that girl's eyes were drawn to the blade.

"Are you afraid of Kusanagi? Don't be, I'll be gentle. I don't want to harm you too badly after all." With that sad, Orochimaru brought the sword up and slashed the girl's left eye up to her temple. "Let's get started with the interrogation, shall we? First question, what is your name?" A simple test to see if the girl would be cooperative. He knew from the tea hag that the girl's name was Tema Maki, but until she presented herself to be one of his tools, there would be no need to address her by her name.

"Na-naruto. My name is Naruto."

Test failed. A shame. Orochimaru sneered as he slashed down the girl's torso. "Again."

"Naruto," the girl spat out, her head raised and the fear disappearing from her eyes.

"Again." This time, he flicked the blade against her neck, scratching a shallow line on her neck. Beads of blood began to decorate her neck. Before his very eyes, the shallow line began to close up. Surprised, Orochimaru glanced back up to the other wounds. The eye slash was slightly healed, not something that he would have noticed had he not been looking for it. The torso slash, on the other hand, had yet to have any noticeable change. _Interesting!_

"Lucky you, you'll have an easy session today. I suggest you rethink your priorities girl. I won't be so kind next time." Orochimaru stalked out of the room, Kusanagi dripping blood on the floor. _Where is that damnable Uzumaki._

* * *

Owl raced through the forests of Fire Country to the Valley of the End. He had explicit orders from Hokage-sama to rendezvous with Jiraiya-sama there and give backup. Owl was stunned. He mainly acting on autopilot. _To think that there would be a Yondaime clone/child...and in the hands of Orochimaru!_ He understood the importance of this mission and with renewed determination, he pumped more chakra through his legs and leapt off a branch.

* * *

Creeping through the shadows, Jiraiya glanced around the cave system. He grunted. _This is taking too long. There are too many cave paths. Orochimaru's minions may catch me before I find the girl._

He took a deep breath before biting his thumb and flipping through handsigns, immediately feeling the huge drain of chakra. There were three large puffs of smoke and the loud sounds of the rock ceiling breaking as huge summons forced their ways inside the small caves. Gamabunta, Gamahiro, and Gamaken appeared side by side, loudly complaining about the lack of room and warning.

"Jiraiya! What is the meaning of this?" Gamabunta's loud cry of complaint could be heard echoing through the rocky hallways.

"Great...now Orochimaru will definitely know that I am here," Jiraiya admonished the Toad Boss. He turned around to face one of the dark hallways. "Go wild here. Distract as many shinobi as you can. I need to go find Minato's legacy," he ordered.

"Don't presume to order me around, Jiraiya!" Gamabunta pulled out his giant tanto and began hacking away at the stone around him. Gamahiro and Gamaken hopped away on their own, leaving paths of mass destruction behind them.

Jiraiya slinked into the shadows of the cave. He figured that the girl would probably be either in the prison cells or the laboratories and he had already checked most of the laboratories before summoning the toads. _The prison cells are probably in the deepest level._ With that thought, Jiraiya slammed his fist down onto the floor and shattered it, revealing another floor underneath. He continued to do this until he was on the last level and punching the floor only revealed cracked stone.

With that, he sat down in a corner and began to mediate. Jiraiya was looking for other chakra signatures near him. He found a weakened one that was presumably a couple rooms over. Quickly bashing through the walls in an effort to go directly to the chakra source, Jiraiya soon reached the room. He hesitated but because he sensed no one else in the room aside from the original source, he obligingly channeled his chakra and punched through the stone wall.


	4. Chasing the White Rabbit

Chapter 4: Chasing the White Rabbit

Blonde hair matted with dirt and dried blood caught his attention first. In the drab muted room, the bright hair color stood out prominently. The girl was still; for a second, Jiraiya thought she was dead, but he saw the minute rise and fall of her chest. Relieved that she was just unconscious, he bent down once he approached her. Gently, he scanned over her body looking for injuries, starting with the feet. Aside from several minor scratches and a couple of shallow stabs and slashes, she looked to be fine.

He slashed through the chains and scooped her up into his arms.

He bounced on the balls of his feet, testing her weight. She was malnourished, very light and delicate looking. Orochimaru was not kind to her for attempting escape. He wondered if the mad shinobi had even fed her lately or anything beyond the bare minimum needed to survive and grow from a test tube baby.

The girl, as Jiraiya scrutinized her face, did indeed resemble Minato. There was no doubt that they were definitely related, but the scars on her faces were different. Three faint marks decorated each of her cheeks.

Jiraiya turned swiftly on his heels and leapt back through the holes he made. He quickly made his way to the Valley of the End to meet up with the ANBU agent from Konoha.

* * *

Jiraiya saw a glint in the in the peripheral of his vision. He pumped extra chakra to his legs and leapt off the branch with extra speed. A large snake slammed into the next tree just after he passed it; the tree crunched before snapping in half. _Orochimaru!_

He spun around in place, eyes peering through the tree leaves looking for the missing-nin and his minions. Jiraiya could hear his blood roaring in his head and his heart hammering as his body's adrenaline rushed to his muscles. He heart the sinister chuckle followed by the rustling of clothes before he saw his once-friend. The laugh echoed throughout the glades. Behind Jiraiya, Orochimaru landed on a branch with a soft tap. His clothes settled down behind him.

Orochimaru's tongue flickered out as if tasting the emotions running wild in the atmosphere.

"It's been a while, Jiraiya." Orochimaru's eyes flickered from Jiraiya's eyes to his captive and back. "I would appreciate it if you would return the girl to me."

"Never," growled Jiraiya, "I won't hand over Minato's legacy to you for you to experiment on." He shifted the girl higher onto his shoulder before firmly gripping her legs with one hand. His other hand flicked out a kunai and braced it in front of him. His feet parted slightly as his knees bent. _I am close enough to the border. If I could just run past Orochimaru, I could meet up with reinforcements_. He pulsed his chakra. Carrying the girl was a major handicap because he only had one hand available.

Orochimaru flipped through five hand seals, channeling his chakra into his prized sword. Kusanagi emitted a faint blue silhouette. Jiraiya's eyes narrowed as he recognized Fuuton: Katto Kaze. Orochimaru leapt off his branch and landed on the forest floor briefly before launching up into the air. He swung Kusanagi and a blast of wind followed up the slash. Jiraiya threw himself and the girl into the air. The blast of air narrowly missed him, slicing off the ends of his red haori. _This is dangerous_ Jiraiya thought as he flared his chakra again.

He landed on a branch further away from Orochimaru, turned around and ran for it. The girl bounced on his back. Orochimaru chased after the two, his neck extending meters away, causing his head to weave from side to side. Jiraiya sensed the chakra of another approaching ninja. _Hopefully that's the Konoha ANBU_. As a last ditch effort to stall for time, he used an extra burst of speed to get some distance between Orochimaru and him before letting go of the girl's legs. With both hands, he swept through the hand seals for Needle Jizo, wrapping the two of them up in his needle-like hair. Orochimaru, approaching the two of them rapidly, almost stabbed his head into the needles before he managed to decelerate. Snarling, Orochimaru whispered, "What? No one-on-one fight for old time's sake? You're the coward, Jiraiya, not me. Waiting on those weaklings? Do you really think they can help you? I'll kill them and then I'll kill you!"

* * *

Owl landed at the appointed meeting place and cautiously reached out his senses. Despite his contact being one of the Sannin, it was always best to be safe. And safe it most definitely was not. There were clear signs of a battle being fought at the current moment. It was a dangerous fight too, judging by the huge amounts of chakra that seemed to be used. A noticeable pulse caught his attention. _A distress signal_. Owl grimaced. He immediately bounded into the trees toward the direction of the fight. With all of the chakra being thrown around, Jiraiya could only be fighting his old teammate. He was not looking forward to this fight at all.

The ANBU narrowed his eyes at the approaching pincushion. As ridiculous as it looked, it certainly did seem like a safe transporting method. Without pausing, Owl slid into pace with the fleeing white porcupine silently. "Jiraiya-sama." He announced himself as an ally to the alert shinobi. Jiraiya acknowledged the ANBU with a firm nod and passed the unconscious girl to him without removing the Needle Jizo.

"Go to the arranged place and wait there. I'll catch up with you." The white-haired Sannin ordered. The hard glint in the man's eyes told Owl that this order was to be obeyed without question. Nodding, the ANBU tightened his grip around the blonde and sped away through the trees.

* * *

Once he was absolutely certain they were a safe distance away, Jiraiya kept moving. Remaining under the cover of his jutsu, Jiraiya continued in the same direction. He was just slow enough that Orochimaru would be able to catch up. Hopefully, he wouldn't notice anything abnormal. A humorless grin was in place on his face. At the very least, he could really surprise the snake this time. _Speak of the devil_.

It was clear from Orochimaru's cautious approach that he already realized that something was amiss. Though since he hadn't followed in the ANBU's steps, it seemed that he didn't know exactly what it was that felt so strange. Without hesitating, Jiraiya quickly closed the distance between them, going through his hand seals before slamming his palm onto the ground beneath Orochimaru's branch. _Kuchiyose: Gamaguchi Shibari_. The ground beneath his hands erupted with pink flesh that proceeded to wrap itself around the two fighters. Orochimaru narrowed his eyes as they were cut off from the outside world. He jumped off of the enveloped branch and watched it recede into the surrounding walls.

"How cute. Do you really think that this will help you, Jiraiya-chan?" Orochimaru mocked, though there was a stiffness in the way he held his body that showed the unease at being in his enemy's space. "Why don't you hand over the girl? It'd be pointless to waste each other's time like this, yes?"

Jiraiya grinned smugly and allowed his hair to recede back to its normal length. "What girl could you be talking about?" He asked innocently, drinking in the anger on Orochimaru's face with delight. The smile slid off his face when his opponent lunged at him, snakes extending from his sleeves, hissing and spitting. Even with the floor itself working against him, Orochimaru was still a dangerous adversary to face. Jiraiya leapt backwards himself, filling his mouth with oil and shooting several Katon: Endans at the approaching serpents. It was effectively countered by a strong stream of water pulled from the humid air around them. The white snakes poured out of the resulting steam. They bit and snapped at Jiraiya's retreating figure, hissing in disappointment when only a few of their attacks connected.

The white-haired sage grumbled at the stinging bites, but retaliated with a force of tunneling wind while simultaneously willing the fleshy mass to trap Orochimaru's feet as soon as he landed. He continued his momentum with a well timed rasengan. The blue orb connected with the side of Orochimaru's body even as the snake twisted unnaturally to avoid the attack. Relatively unfazed by the blow besides a small grimace, Orochimaru's head stretched toward his attacker and unsheathed the Kusanagi in his mouth. The sword rushed at Jiraiya, managing to sink into Jiraiya's arm before he could manage to dodge. The sage gritted his teeth and dislodged the sharp metal. He distanced himself before the telekinetically controlled sword could pierce him again. Their taijutsu was on a similar level, and with that sword there...it would be best not to get too close unless he evened the odds.

Jiraiya bit down on his thumb for the second time that day and summoned Gamaken to his aid. "Again?" Gamaken sighed. "I'm pretty clumsy, but I'll do my best." He drew his sasumata and charged. The sword came down and slashed, but was halted by the sake dish shaped shield that the toad bore. In a few excruciating seconds, Gamaken pushed the floating weapon back, though not without large cracks decorating the pristine shield.

Orochimaru narrowed his eyes. Despite his pride of being stronger than his ex-teammate, he knew that the odds had certainly tilted in Jiraiya's favor. The snake's goal was simply to retrieve the girl, but it seemed that retrieving her would have to be reserved for another day. He did not know how many reinforcements Jiraiya would get, but he did not intend to wait and find out. With his self-preservation in mind, Orochimaru recalled his sword to his side and sliced at the wall of the great toad's oesophagus. The blade sunk into it cleanly, and the snake was able to slip out of the opening he had created before it could be reformed. With the battle now over, Jiraiya recalled his summons and headed toward the Valley of the End, making sure to check for any chakra signatures that could have been following him.

* * *

Naruto coughed gently; her spine straightening, lifting off Jiraiya's back. Opening her eyes, she could see the swishing coat of her carrier and the geta that he wore. She stiffened. _Who was carrying her?_

A large hand patted the curve of her behind. "You're awake, missy?" The voice spoke the words casually yet they struck a chord within her. It wasn't the words or the potentially dangerous situation, but the voice...it was so familiar. Naruto attempted to twist around the bulky torso to see her captor only to stop. Shaggy white hair dangled in front of her like worm bait on a fishing pole. _Jiraiya!_ She gasped and abruptly broke into a fit of coughs. Gentle hands placed themselves on her legs and torso before lifting her off the shoulder. In between her coughs, she realized that she was being set back against a tree trunk. Another pair of sandaled feet dropped down on a branch nearby, but Naruto's gaze was caught by the geta in front of her. Slowly, she let her gaze rise up the legs, past the torso, and braced herself for the face.

The familiar painted face brought tears to her eyes. She had missed him.

* * *

Jiraiya was never very comfortable when a person of the female gender suddenly burst into tears in front of him. This case was no different. The blonde clung to the man's back and sobbed into it as if she never wanted to let go. _What did Orochimaru do to this girl?_ He sighed and stroked her hair in a soothing motion to calm her hysterics. They sat on the branch for a time until Maki's shuddering breaths slowed to a point where she could more easily breathe. "Ero-sennin, there's so much I have to tell you and-" The words rasped out quietly, nearly inaudible, though she choked up again when she tried speaking.

"Ero-sennin?" Jiraiya inquired, amused at where she picked this particular nickname from. Maki forced herself to take several deep breaths and pull away from her tight hold. The tear stains on her cheeks were still slightly damp, but she looked much more stable now.

"I am Uzumaki Naruto."

* * *

Jiraiya leered as Maki took a deep breath and her chest pressed out daringly. _Hmm...a large B maybe? Or a small C?_ he mused. _Not bad._ They danced as she exhaled and his eyes, enraptured, followed the motion. A pale hand waved before his eyes, interrupting his show.

"It's...a hard to believe story, but I'm telling the truth. Please believe me," She paused and hesitantly peered at him through her bangs. Jiraiya nodded encouragingly.

"I'm not from here- this time or this dimension. I'm not sure which. You...and Orochimaru aren't alive. That's how I know that this is all wrong, but you didn't recognize me as Naruto. So I guess it's not the past."

"The Third Great Shinobi War ended 8 years ago and the Naruto here is a seven-year old boy. Does that help?"

"Definitely in the past and in a different dimension at least. I'm definitely female and Naruto. Plus, the Third Great Shinobi War ended 18 years ago for me. The Fourth just ended. I was…" Her voice broke off then and her head lowered a touch. Jiraiya observed her chin quiver a little as she tried to maintain her composure. "Sorry...my best friend died at the end of the war."

"If it makes you feel any better, you probably won't be able to see her anyway now."

"...Him," she corrected him, "and I won't be able to see any of my friends." She sniffed a little but continued determinedly.

"Then the Kyuubi attack has already happened?" She continued after receiving confirmation. "Then in a year, the Uchiha clan will be killed off by Uchiha Itachi. Unsatisfied with their station in the village, they were planning a coup. Four years later, at Naruto's first Chunin Exam, Orochimaru will attack Konoha, killing the Sandaime Hokage and running off with the last Uchiha, Uchiha Sasuke, my best friend.

This is also when the Akatsuki makes their appearance. Originally led by Yahiko, Nagato, and Konan, the group was taken over by Uchiha Obito. He survived the Kannabi Bridge mission and was healed by Uchiha Madara and a man named Zetsu. I'll tell you more about Zetsu later. He's a really important person. Anyway, so the Akatsuki were hunting...er...will hunt?

This is so hard!" Naruto screamed, wringing her hands through her hair.

"Just talk in past tense then," he suggested.

"Alright. The Akatsuki were hunting jinchuurikis and their bijuus so you took me on a three-year training trip. After that, we came back to Konoha. You left to return to your spymaster duties and I was quickly drafted to help Suna recover Gaara, who was a jinchuuriki Kazekage that was kidnapped by Akatsuki. After that it was a whirlwind of missions and training."

"When do I die?"

"I was just about to get to it. You were in Amegakure investigating the Akatsuki when you got into a fight with Nagato and Konan. They killed you. Less than a month later, Nagato, then known as Pein, and Konan attacked Konoha. I saved the village using senjutsu. Baa-chan woke up from her coma and went to the Five Kage Summit where Obito declared war on the villages. We formed the shinobi alliance and won the war together."

"Who is Baa-chan and where does Sasuke come into all of this?"

"Baa-chan is Senju Tsunade. Sasuke...he killed Orochimaru and his brother, Itachi. Obito picked him up after that...and Sasuke fought for him. He joined the Shinobi Alliance briefly to take down Zetsu. But, he turned on us afterwards. We fought, Sasuke and I, like it was always meant to be and I won as you can see."

"That's an incredible story," Jiraiya was gobsmacked. Sure, he knew about time-space fuuinjutsu and his student was a foremost expert on it, but to actually meet someone who had traveled in time and across dimensions? "I guess the Uzumaki blood flows strong in you," he said lightly trying to brighten up the conversation after that solemn briefing of the future. "We're going to have to figure out a way to integrate you into Konoha- you do want that right?"

"Of course! I'll never abandon Konoha. Konoha has and will always be my home! Dattebayo!"

"It's all so unbelievable, like you said. I doubt anyone will be able to guess the truth so any old cover should do for you. You have no paper trail at all anyway."

"What'd you tell jii-chan for him to send an ANBU to meet up with you?"

"My encoded missive suggested that you were the product of one of Orochimaru's experiments with Minato's DNA, perhaps a female clone or a daughter created in a laboratory. It was the logical conclusion after hearing about your bright vivid blonde hair, blue eyes, and the way you moved like a yellow flash. That's it!" Jiraiya slammed his fist to his palm. "I know what your cover can be!"

* * *

"Sensei, I would like you to meet Minato and Mito's daughter."

 **AN: Ruka- Sorry that a lot of this chapter was pretty much a summary of the plot. I had to get it out of the way eventually, but I did try to keep it as short as possible. Thanks for all the positive feedback guys! Tsuki- Yup, you guys are awesome! Thanks so much for the positive response~ Also I'm going to apologize for the poor fight scene...they're not exactly my area of expertise but hey I tried.**


	5. The Chesire Cat Grins

Chapter 5: The Chesire Cat Grins

Jiraiya held a hand out in front of Maki. She came to a stop behind him, head leaning back as she took in the glorious site in front of her. _Konoha._ Her home was in front of her once again. The familiar large red gates loomed above her. Behind her, she heard Owl gently tap onto the ground.

"Welcome to Konoha, Maki-chan. This will be your home from now on," Jiraiya murmured to her as he placed his warm palm on the lower end of her back, gently guiding her towards the slowly opening gates. The gate doors creaked as they inched open, gradually revealing a nostalgic vision. The three shinobi strode to the gatekeeper's stand where an attending jounin stood at attention.

"Jiraiya-sama! ANBU-san! Who is this?" the jounin inquired, "For recording purposes of course, Jiraiya-sama."

"Write her down as Tema Maki. A Konoha shinobi hopeful." With that said, Jiraiya flicked his hand forward before leaping through the gates and onto the nearest roof. The jounin watched as the blonde woman mimicked the legendary sage's movements flawlessly. _Hopeful indeed._ He turned to address this to the ANBU, but the ANBU was already gone without a trace.

"The ANBU is going to report to jiji?" Maki asked once she recovered her breath.

"Yes. We can take our time to peruse Konoha on our way to the Hokage Tower. After all, it's been awhile since you've seen this version of Konoha." The girl nodded while taking in the site of a whole Konoha again, without the signs of war that stained it for so long. There was the weapon smithy with its grumpy old owner who was kind enough to give her a discount or two after a particularly bad day. Over in the east side was the flirty grocer with that mole under his right eye. And there was good old Ichiraku Ramen with Teuchi and Amane hard at work. It was so hard to imagine all of this as it was in her future, and Maki almost didn't want to connect the two together. _I will not let all of this get destroyed this time._ The old flicker of determination flashed in her eyes once more, after the weeks spent in Orochimaru's lair had dimmed it.

* * *

"In Sensei's office, let me do the talking, alright?" Jiraiya's voice rumbled in the peaceful noises of the daily life below them. "Let me break the news gently and explain it to him. We don't want him to have a heart attack." Maki grunted noncommittally. _Jiji's alive too...It'll be good to see him again._

After several minutes of watching the lively Konoha citizens mill around the village as they leaped above them, they reached the base of the Hokage Tower. Jiraiya glanced at Maki from the corner of his eye.

"How do you want to make your entrance? Use standard protocol and good manners and go through the office door?" Jiraiya acted stern, but quickly dropped the facade to continue his little comic routine. "Or would you rather go in through the window?"

Laughing uproariously as she took a running leap towards the Hokage Tower wall, Maki answered, "Isn't that an obvious choice?" Together, they scaled the vertical wall and stood on the roof by the Hokage's office window. Jiraiya shifted next to the window and knocked on the glass pane gently. Inside, Sarutobi sighed at his student.

* * *

"Sensei, I would like you to meet Minato and Mito's daughter."

Sarutobi choked on his pipe. One fist pounded his chest as the other tried to yank his pipe out of his throat. _So much for not giving the man a heart attack._ A smile tugged at Maki's lips at Jiraiya's antics.

"To be more accurate, Maki here is a baby created from Minato's and Mito's DNA. That would make her Naruto's half-sister." Jiraiya offered as some explanation. It did not help mollify the Sandaime Hokage at all. He continued choking and sputtering nonsense. It was one thing to implant the Shodaime Hokage's DNA into babies but it was another thing to actually make a baby out of two unwilling participants.

A wide grin broke out on Jiraiya's poker face. "I'm just yanking your chain, Sensei. That's the cover story that we would like you back us up on. The truth is-"

"Let me say it, ero-sennin." Maki excitedly interrupted Jiraiya, blatantly ignoring his words from before. "I'm from the future of an alternate dimension. You would better know me as Uzumaki Naruto. Dattebayo!"

The sputtering which had paused briefly came back with a vengeance.

"Jiji, I've missed you so much." Maki's voice cracked a little. She could still see the dark coffin and feel the cold tears of the sky pouring down on the village on that day. Now here he was in front of her, still smoking the same old pipe in the same old chair. Maki leapt towards the Hokage's desk, her palms slamming down onto the wooden table with a loud thunk. She leaned forward with tearing eyes. "You look just like I remembered," she whimpered as she brought her arms around the Hokage and pulled him into a hug.

Sarutobi felt himself be enveloped by warmth. His face was pressed into soft, clean cloth and his pipe had fallen onto his desk with an echoing clank. The silence was interrupted periodically by the Maki's muted crying into the Hokage's iconic hat. Hesitantly,he brought his hand to pat her back softly. Taking note of how unhealthily skinny the girl was in the embrace, he glared at Jiraiya. That perverted student of his was blatantly enjoying the view of Maki's backside and his discomfort in the situation.

"Now, now, why don't you explain what you are talking about?" As much as he could tell that Maki, no Naruto, needed this, Sarutobi still felt that he needed light shed on this situation. He knew, though, that Maki would need time to calm herself again before being able to speak, and he remained patient until he could obtain his answers. As soon as he heard the sniffling come to a shuddering halt, Sarutobi jumped at the chance to find out exactly what was happening. He grabbed his hat and placed it gently on the desk next to him, reminding himself that he would need to get it cleaned. He watched as Naruto backed up slightly. Crossing his fingers and resting his elbows against the desk, he peered over his fingers at the girl. _Hard to believe that this female claims to be Naruto. To think that such a scrawny boy could have grown into such a pretty woman._

Jiraiya placed a large hand on the girl's shoulder. He stood tall and formal, this time completely serious, and began to recite his report.

* * *

Maki grasped the forehead protecter reverently. If it weren't for the weight of the cool metal in her palms, she almost would have believed that these events were a long drunken dream.

"I...I never thought I would have one of these again. After all of that Sasuke crap and my headband being destroyed, I thought we would all use the Shinobi Alliance forehead protectors from then on." With a shaky hand, her fingertips traced the cold engraving. Both Sarutobi and Jiraiya watched as determination burned brightly in her eyes. This hitai-ite was the physical manifestation of her unspoken promise to this timeline's village. It may not be the village that she herself grew up in, but she could never let it and its citizens go through what she had to. Her universe was already at peace while the beginnings of the Fourth Shinobi War were already starting to gather here. Maki couldn't leave; at least not now. Her posture straightened unconsciously in her resolve, and she almost seemed to transform in the two observers' eyes. They watched in awe as she became someone worthy and capable of the great heroic feats she told them of. _A Hokage-worthy shinobi, indeed_.

Suddenly, Maki collapsed onto the ground in a flurry of cloth with a loud thump and a small shriek. A deeper grunt followed en suite. Flabbergasted and slightly amused, Sarutobi and Jiraiya watched the pile of two human bodies struggle to right themselves. Maki grimaced as she took a millisecond to reorient herself. She was lying on something warm and hard. She felt a heated breath blow the crown of her head, shifting her hair around. Callused hands grasped her upper and lower back respectively. She could feel the surface she landed on rise up and down slightly. _Oh no…_

Cautiously, Maki lifted herself up onto her elbows and raised her head. Her eyes met the amused dark eyes of an Uchiha. She could feel the blood rushing to her ears. The male's lips lifted into a smug smirk.

"Enjoying the view, sweetheart?" the Uchiha purred, "I haven't even met you yet and you've already fallen for me."

"W-what?!" Maki's voice raised a few pitches. "What the hell are you playing at, teme?" Her voice lowered to a growl. She was always antagonistic towards these kinds of people after the stories Granny Tsunade had told her.

The teme in question laughed off the threat. "C'mon, that's the thanks I get for not falling on top of you?"

"That's the thanks you get for not having let me go yet."

"That's enough fooling around, Shisui," Sarutobi commanded with a small smile.

Remembering the audience, Maki leapt off the prone Shisui like he was a flirty Sasuke and scrabbled backwards. Getting up himself, the Uchiha, now identified as Shisui, straightened the himself out. He patted himself down, dusting off his pants and back, before bending down and offering his hands to her.

"Need some help?" he grinned. Maki flushed angrily before shaking her head side from side vigorously. She shifted her weight to her feet and launched off the floor. She stood up with her hands on her hips. She glared kunais at him, daring him to continue with the flirting.

"No!" _So this is Shisui? The other Uchiha hero shrouded in darkness? He sure doesn't look like he belongs in it. He certainly doesn't act like an Uchiha either...maybe there's a correlation._ "And that was a terrible pick up line," she deadpanned. Shisui shushin'ed into a corner and jokingly crouched there dejectedly surrounded by a mass of darkness. When the Hokage cleared his throat imperatively, he stood up and walked into the center of the large office. He crouched on his knee, fist on the ground and back straight, submissive before his Hokage. His face was emotionless, the perfect ninja's poker face, Maki noticed. Voice level and serious, Shisui began to speak.

"Jounin Uchiha Shisui reporting for duty, Hokage-sama. Mission 40156 completed successfully. No obstacles encountered."

Sarutobi glanced at Jiraiya and Maki who stood together against the wall of his office. Jiraiya stared at the young male avidly, trying to piece together the story behind the brief report and his background knowledge on the current events. The Hokage could see the gears clicking inside his student's brain. There was no way after all, that Shisui, Konoha's foremost genjutsu specialist, would be sent out on some average mission and be allowed to do an immediate report. Making eye contact with Jiraiya, Sarutobi nodded. Jiraiya set his lips into a grim line.

"Report acknowledged. You may come back Friday morning at nine to continue give me your more detailed debriefing and report. I have something else for you to do right now, Shisui.

I want you to guide a new member of our shinobi forces, Maki-chan. Tema Maki is Konoha's newest jounin. I expect you to give her a full tour of Konoha," Sarutobi gave a grandfatherly smile to the two young shinobi. "It should give you some downtime after your mission. I'm sure Maki-chan will be good company."

"Hai, Hokage-sama," Shisui obediently replied. He stood up and turned towards the mentioned girl with a friendly grin. _So that's her name. Cute. It suits her. Now, how do I ask her if she wants to clean up without sounding like an asshole?_ "Can I call you Maki? Or would you prefer Tema-san?" Maki turned over her thoughts in her head, brushing back her bangs in her thinking. Finally, she sighed a little before replying.

"Maki is fine if I can call you Shisui, in return," she replied with a wide grin, previous irritation forgotten for now. _Sociable_ , he noticed.

"Is there anything that you would like to see first?" he asked her as he began to walk out of the Hokage's office. He made sure his strides were not too long or hurried. He wanted the pretty girl to think he was a cool guy after all. As they walked out the door, they could hear Jiraiya's calls for them to have fun together. Maki pulled a face before grinning and waving at the sennin. Shisui could not help but wonder how close the girl was to some of Konoha's strongest and what that meant for him as her appointed tour guide.

"Shisui, if you don't mind, can we go to a clothing shop first?" she gestured a hand at her body, "I look and feel like a mess." That certainly wasn't a point to be argued, with the tattered condition of her clothing and the faint smudges of dirt and dried blood on her exposed skin.

Shisui scratched the back of his ear in embarrassment as he nodded, "I was trying to figure out a nice way to break it out to you. Was planning on discreetly walking past some kunoichi clothing stores." He looked down at her and held out a hand in front of him. There were a couple other administrative shinobi walking the halls that stared openly as Shisui bowed a little. "Right after you, sweetheart."

"You really like calling me that. Do you call all the girls you meet 'sweetheart'?" The blonde teased a little, realizing that the flirting was really something she would just have to deal with.

"Of course not! Only the pretty ones like you," Shisui replied with an affronted tone. Maki gave him a look. He held a hand to his heart dramatically. "You wound me so, fair maiden!"

The scenario was so ridiculous that combined with all the emotional stress Maki had been feeling up to late and the relaxed feeling that she felt from being within Konoha's walls again, she burst into giddy laughter. With her contagious mirth, it wasn't long before the Uchiha's chuckles joined her own. Together, the two jounins cracked up in the hallways of the Hokage Tower with gaping chunins surrounding them.

* * *

"Maki, what's your favorite color?" Shisui rifled through the clothes hangers. He mentally braced himself for the shopping trip of his lifetime. _Oh, the horrors of shopping with the other gender!_ He hoped that this would be nothing like those trips that his female cousins dragged Itachi and him on every so often, but he knew it would be even worse. Maki looked like she lacked everything in the material sense. He shuddered just thinking about how much she would shove onto him to hold for her. Too lost in his thoughts, he missed Maki's answer. He felt a hand tap his shoulder and he whirled around to face the inevitable.

"Wha-" he was interrupted by a fabric being shoved in his face. His entire vision was covered in orange. "Orange?"

"I'm done! Let's go pay," Maki demanded, waving at a pile of clothes in front of her. Shisui's eyes were drawn to the orange cloth in her hand, then the small pile now in her arms, and then back to her face. He blinked slowly.

"Already? We've barely been here for five minutes."

"I'm a fast shopper. I only need one outfit for now; I'll come back later to get some casual clothes, but there's no need for you to be with me for that."

Shisui watched, flabbergasted, as she marched over to the cashier.

"Hey! Can I borrow some money? We can get ero-sennin to pay you back later." Shisui nodded mutely, still stunned about the swiftness of the shopping excursion. _If only all the females of this world were like Maki-chan._ He took out his wallet and pulled out a couple thousand ryo. He noticed the cashier simpering at him, fluttering her eyelashes. A good, discrete whiff of his surroundings proved his suspicions. The cashier was a fangirl drowning herself in perfume. _Escape from the frying pan and into fangirl hell._ She grasped the change lightly and placed it in his waiting palm. Her fingers lightly skimmed his fingers and Shisui concealed his shudders of disgust. It was just one more reason he avoided shopping if at all possible.

Maki quickly swept her bundle of clothes into the provided plastic bag.

"Let's go, Shisui. I want you to show me the hot springs. Feel gross," Maki spoke matterfactedly. The fangirl cashier's eyes widened as she took in Maki's words and Shisui couldn't help but grin at the effective shut down. He stuffed the money back into his wallet and grabbed Maki's thin wrist. He pulled her out of the store.

As soon as they were out the door, Shisui paused and turned to Maki with a grateful smile, "Thanks for that."

"Don't you like flirting though?" Maki teased him with a smirk. _Karma was great sometimes._

Shisui responded with a dramatic shiver and whisper. "Fangirls are terrifying creatures."

Maki nodded agreeably. "My best friend was also plagued by fangirls, so I know how to deal with these situations…" _Sasuke._ "Which way to the hot springs?"

Shisui grinned and headed south. Maki hurried to catch up and overtook him. Shisui watched Maki's back as she walked in front of him, marveling at Konoha's busy market. Her shopping bag waved back and forth on her arm. _How peaceful._

 _Caw. Caw. Caw._

Shisui's eyes flickered to the crow perched on the roof of a grocery store. The crow moved its beak up and down several times before jerking its head towards the left. Shisui stiffened minutely. _Naka River?_

"Hurry up, you slowpoke!" Maki had backtracked back to him and was staring up at him with a pouty face. Her eyes followed his gaze before he had the chance to look away and took in the crow. "Aren't you a pretty birdy?" _It reminds me of Itachi's crow- the one that was shoved down my throat- now that I'm looking at it..._

Before Maki could investigate the bird any further, Shisui caught her attention with a hand on her shoulder. "Wouldn't you rather look at this pretty birdy?" Maki gave him the dryest look she could manage.

"That...was somehow even worse than before." Still, it was enough to get her attention off of the bird for now, and she continued on their path. Shisui inwardly sighed in relief before following after her. A quick glance to the same spot revealed that the crow was gone.

* * *

 **A REALLY SHORT AU OMAKE (We have other plan** **s for the plot, so treat this as some AU fluff in preparation for actual fluff in the future.)**

Maki watched as Kurenai and Asuma got into another fight over his smoking habits.

"Why can't you just stop smoking? It's terrible for you."

"Why can't you just leave me alone? I haven't died yet!"

"That's exactly why I want you to stop! We already have such short lifespans, I don't want you to die even earlier because of your stupid cancer sticks…" Kurenai turned on her heel with a swirl of her dress. She gritted her teeth and stomped away. One last sentence trailed in her after wake. "We're over!" Asuma groaned while ruffling through his vest for his wallet. He threw a couple of bills down on his table before chasing after her.

"Sorry guys. I hope we didn't ruin the evening for everyone."

The group of gathered jounins and chunins stared flabbergasted after the couple that were perfectly happy and harmonious not even an hour ago. A couple of the shinobi even sneaked some fearful glances at the other resident couple, Shisui and Maki. Silence ruled the bar for several minutes before Genma snorted and said "Good riddance. Their fifth breakup was long overdue. Who wants to bet on when they get back together?" He clapped his cup down onto the table and pulled out a black notebook. As the surrounding shinobi swarmed Genma while screaming their bets and slapping down ryo, Maki looked contemplatively in the direction the now ex-couple stormed off in.

"What's wrong, Maki?" Shisui, who had an arm wrapped around her torso, questioningly murmured to her. He gently kissed the top of her head before looking at her.

Maki hesitated as she looked back at him. "I...I was just thinking. We don't normally argue like Kurenai and Asuma but at the same time, we don't really talk about what we don't like about each other. All you've ever said was to eat less ramen…"

She stopped before peering up at him through her blond eyelashes.

"I want us to be happy together and I'm willing to change for you. Is there something you want me to change? My hairstyle? My messiness?"

Shisui chuckled. "Was that it? I was actually worried for a second there."

Affronted, Maki flushed and threw off the hand at her waist. "I'm trying to have a serious conversation here, Shisui!"

"And so am I. Maki, I love you. All of you. He grabbed her hand and kissed a trail up her bare arm before leaving her elbow for her neck. Eventually, he reached her lips and he gave her a gentle, chaste kiss that only lasted a mere second. Wide-eyed, Maki's gaze stared into Shisui's smoldering eyes. He smirked.

"There's only one thing I want to change about you. Your family name," with that said, Shisui got up from his bench to kneel in front of his beloved girlfriend. "I was planning on waiting a couple weeks for your birthday but this was just too good of a timing."

Maki gaped. Once again, silence ruled the bar as all the shinobis' eyes were drawn to the movement of Shisui kneeling.

"Won't you marry me, Maki?"

 **Ruka: So...like...instead of actually writing the fic, I decided to write a drabble. It's my first attempt at something cute and fluffy :**

 **I hope it's good enough.**

 **How Tsukiko and I write this fanfic: I write and constantly remind Tsukiko to write. I write some stuff, the bare bones of the story (the plot) and Tsukiko is like "omg ruka you gotta add more details" and she spends all her time filling in details**

 **Tsuki: That sounds about right haha..though there are certain scenes that you do leave up to me, and I flounder about like a sad fish and write things like that poor excuse of a fight scene I wrote a chapter or so ago...** **At least we're writing more in these chapters** **! (Sorry bout the wait and all. Distractions and school and more distractions and such)** **And you guys are all brilliant! 87 follows and 47 favorites! That's nuts! (for me anyways haha...) Have some digital cookies~**


	6. A Mad Tea Party at Ichiraku's

Chapter 6: A Mad Tea Party at Ichiraku's

Maki sighed happily as she sunk into the warmth of the water around her. Steam curled lazily into the air. She leaned her back against the heated rocks and stretched her arms and legs in a large motion with a satisfied sound. It was really a great feeling to be clean once again. Scrubbing off the layers of grime and blood had a calming effect on her. Had it really been nearly two weeks since she had been even remotely clean? Her smile faded a little and her brows creased at the thought. She wiggled her toes a little in the air.

The blonde intended on saving everyone in due time. There were certainly priorities like Nagato and Obito, but Orochimaru...It had been hard enough to forgive (and by that she meant agree not to hunt down and most likely seriously injure) the snake with Sasuke's situation alone. Now that she was more acquainted with his sadistic tendencies, the decision to condemn him a lifetime in T&I was extremely tempting. Maki grimaced at her own idea, but decided to still give the man at least an opportunity to change. _Somewhere deep, deep, deep, down...there still has to be some of Ero-sensei's old teammate that's hanging on right? Maybe._ She half submerged her head and blew a mass of bubbles in her frustration.

Her ears twitched. She could hear someone's feet padding along the damp stones followed by the sounds of another body displacing the hot water. Maki flicked her eyes to the newcomer. Thick, medium length black hair tied up in a bun. A pale curvaceous body -it was Jiraiya's fault that Maki would ever even observe that- and startlingly recognizable red eyes. The woman waded deeper into the spring, making it easier to confirm these characteristics. _Kurenai_ , Maki realized with a jolt. _Wonder how Mirai is doing_ …

Kurenai looked up to see the blonde submerged in the water looking at her. Whether she was staring into space or just plain _staring_ was something else entirely, though Kurenai felt slightly self-conscious about it either way. The brunette fidgeted uncomfortably under the weight of the Maki's perpetual stare. After a long silence disturbed only by the sounds of the rushing water, Kurenai could stand it no longer. She blurted out.

"I've never seen you around! Are you a foreign ambassador?" The blonde blinked bemusedly. She waved a hand flippantly.

"No. I'm a Konoha jounin," Maki stated firmly with her wide, blue eyes peering at Kurenai above the water's surface. _Frog-like, almost_ , Kurenai thought until her brain processed exactly what the girl said. _A jounin? Her?_

"But I've never seen you before. And you're so young! Are you a genius?" The fact that the blonde was a female went unsaid. Kurenai was floored and she couldn't help with her fluster of questions. If the girl was telling the truth, then that meant she was a prime example of females being able to become jounin; as strong as the male shinobi, even. And at her age? Female prodigies were nearly unheard of- only Tsunade-sama. Kurenai caught herself before she began to hero-worship a stranger. A prodigious female that became a jounin but no one (Kurenai, at the very least) had ever seen or heard of. _Impossible._

She was interrupted out of her thoughts by the blonde's response. Maki gave Kurenai a wry grin. "Age is deceptive, but I'm no prodigy. I've worked hard and there were a lot of special circumstances surrounding my case. No worries, I'm definitely a strong jounin and loyal to Sandaime-sama."

Kurenai saw a chance here. There was no way that Hokage-sama would let someone as distinctive looking as the blonde wander about the village if she was really a foreign spy. It was also a pretty bold, and honestly stupid, move to pretend to be among the village's best shinobi.

"Can you help me?" She paused. Flustered, she wrung her hands together above the water. "I mean-" the brunette stuttered as she tried to explain. "I want to become a jounin. I want to prove to Asuma, to Kakashi, to Genma that women can become strong."

Maki watched the nervous kunoichi soaking in front of her stare determinedly back at her with earnest eyes. Kurenai was flushed, both from the heat of the hot spring and from having to beg a girl younger than her for training. _I wonder if this is what Jiraiya saw when I tried to force him to me for the Chunin Finals. Although_ , she reminisced, _I most definitely wasn't this shy. I want to help Kurenai-sensei, but I haven't taught anyone since Konohamaru and I'm not sure if the Sexy Jutsu and the Rasengan qualifies me to teach._

"Ahhh…" the blonde threw her head back and slid her arms on the stones behind her as she leaned back. "Alright."

 _Maybe this is is for the best. The first step in changing our future. I'll make a friend out of her!_

"I don't even know your name and you don't know mine. Should you really be asking me for training?" Maki smirked teasingly. "Maybe introductions are in order first. I'm alright with training you. Anything to make the village stronger after all."

Kurenai flushed harder, if possible. "Of course! I'm Yuhi Kurenai, Chunin and hopeful Jounin. And you?"

"Tema Maki. New jounin and ex-wanderer." The blonde lazily skimmed her arm about the surface of the water, creating ripples. As the ripples reached Kurenai, Maki continued. "I'll be at Training Ground 29 starting at 7 o'clock for the rest of the week. You can feel free to join me then. We can spar to practice taijutsu. My body is a bit weak right now, so I could use the exercise as well."

Her fellow bathmate shook her head contemplatively before asking, "Do you think I could practice my genjutsu on you?"

"Are you trying to become a tokubetsu jounin specializing in genjutsu before you advance to jounin?" Maki tapped her chin before swimming to sit next to Kurenai. "Speaking of which, what's your nature type?"

"I'm an earth elemental type but primarily a yin release. One of Konoha's best genjutsu users." Kurenai stated proudly.

"If you use pretty tame genjutsus on me, then it's fine. But I've got a pretty dark history and would rather not bring it up." Kurenai furrowed her brows in an obvious question. "Er…" Maki scratched the back of her neck. "I mean...life as a wanderer was pretty rough especially during the war and stuff you know?"

Kurenai nodded in agreement as the hot spring descended into awkward silence. The two young women both sunk deeper in the water as they tried to come up with something to revive the conversation with. _Perhaps,_ Kurenai thought, _I could ask her about how Maki feels about Konoha. As a new member, she must not have many friends._ Her thoughts were interrupted by a boisterous voice yelling over the wooden wall separating the two genders' baths.

"Oi, Maki! You done yet? I feel like I'm shriveling up into a Shisui-prune. How could the ladies like me then?" Cries of mirth and much back slapping could be heard from the males' side of the wall as the shinobis there laughed along with Shisui.

Maki looked apologetically at Kurenai, her pretty face pouting. "Shisui and I are going out for ramen after this. You just got in a bit ago so...I guess I'll see you in the morning sometime soon?" Kurenai nodded in affirmation.

"Thanks for the opportunity! I'll definitely be there tomorrow."

"Alright." Maki paused before taking in a big breath. "We're leaving Shisui!" The blonde grabbed the towel on her head and, as she leapt out of the hot spring with a loud splash, wrapped it around her body tightly. Kurenai kept her eyes to herself. _No need to make her new sparring partner feel awkward._

"Bye Kurenai-san!" The blonde gave a bright smile to the brunette before bounding off into the changing rooms. Said woman chuckled at the cheery girl before sinking down into the water. _I'll go get some new genjutsu scrolls from the Archives to practice tonight for tomorrow. And ask around for some more info on Maki. Maybe Anko will know._

* * *

Maki's grin stayed glued on her face even as she left Kurenai's company. She was in a truly good mood. _Kurama, I've made a new friend!_ Silence greeted her. _Ah!_ The blonde slapped a palm to her forehead as her grin faded away. _I forgot! Kurama's still sleeping. Lazy, fat lump of fur._ A half-asleep sounding growl turned into a yawn before falling silent again. _Leaving me here all alone,_ she grouched.

The blonde soon reached her locker where she had stuffed her new bag of clothes into. Pulling the noisy plastic out, she dumped its contents onto a wooden bench. Undergarments went on first before Maki grabbed her orange top. It was a ¾ sleeve qipao style blouse with black lining and wide, billowing sleeves. _A tribute to best friend Sakura and a fellow great kunoichi TenTen with a Naruto dash of color._

It looked like Sakura was getting her wish to stuff a Naruto into girlier outfits after all. Though, the qipao like blouse was still easy enough to move around in unlike the other things that Sakura had her try on. Standard black shinobi pants to the calves and black sandals completed her ensemble. As Maki walked out of the locker room, she began to wrap her lower arms up to her mid-palms.

"Ramen, ramen, ramen. ramen" Maki sang as she flipped the curtains of the locker room exit. "Going to get some ramen."

Shisui was already outside waiting for her, and grinned when he saw the joyous, now much cleaner, blonde. "You clean up well, sweetheart!" Maki rolled her eyes and decided to turn the topic to the extremely important mission ahead of them. She didn't even get a word out as they turned a very familiar corner. Mission start.

"RAMEN!" Maki gave a great holler filled with absolute love and devotion as Ichiraku came into view. She moved so quickly that all the bystanders saw was a yellow streak.

"Oy old man! Give me your biggest bowl of miso ramen!" the blonde cried as she barged into the small restaurant and planted herself firmly onto a stool. Shisui stood several feet away blinking in shock at the girl's behavior before following in a calmer fashion. Teuchi did a double-take at the similar features between his current, and favorite, customer and the newcomer. However, the old owner caught himself and smiled in acknowledgement. Shisui quickly ordered his meal and the ramen maker went to the back to hand make his famous noodles.

It only took a brief moment for the two blondes to turn and observe the other. Maki was briefly astounded, while Naruto was open-mouthed in his confusion. The girl knew she would eventually run into her younger _male_ self, -it seemed that with their ramen craziness, it was inevitable- but she certainly didn't expect it this quickly.

The silence that followed was tense. The smaller blonde flinched a little. _Why is he afraid?_

 _Ah...right now, we only have ojii-san and Ichiraku. Can't have it stay that way anymore._

"Hey there, kiddo!" the automatic grumbling that preceded this comment had her grinning. "The name's Tema Maki. What about you?" she stuck her hand out in greeting. Naruto glared hard at the appendage, as if it were a cruel joke. Deciding that it was safe, the child tentatively put his hand in hers. When the girl didn't flinch or pull away, he smiled widely and shook the hand more vigorously.

"I'm Uzumaki Naruto and I'm going to be the greatest Hokage ever- ttebayo!" Maki laughed at the child's infectious energy.

"Don't you mean the orange menace?" Shisui slipped himself into the conversation with. "I swear, between the ANBU and the Uchiha police, we still don't have enough manpower to deal with your pranks." Maki's eyes twinkled at the mention of her favorite pastime.

"Pranks, huh..." Her voice trailed mischievously and Shisui paled. "I may have a few ideas you would possibly like. Better yet, what do you say we pull some together?

I just joined the village and what better way to introduce myself to the wonderful people of Konoha than a large-scale prank?" The two chuckled and began to scheme in contained whispers.

* * *

Shisui had to admit that this newcomer was already odd from the beginning. Maki was certainly unlike other females that he knew at any rate. It wasn't a bad thing, though. -it would mean that shopping with her wouldn't be nightmarish thankfully- What was even odder was how eerily similar she was to Naruto. He hadn't made note of it before, as he didn't know Konoha's jinchuriki personally, but when the two were together shoveling down ramen at disturbingly fast rates? It was very...odd; definitely too much to be a mere coincidence. It looked like he would have to do some digging eventually. _The Hokage probably knows, though he wouldn't tell me. If worst comes to worst, I can always 'borrow' some records to look through._

He absentmindedly finished his noodles and pulled out his wallet. "How much is that going to be Teuchi-san? I'll pay for the kid, too." It couldn't be too much. After all, it was a young woman and a child no more than six years old. The old man handed him a sheet of paper with a suppressed laugh. Shisui looked at the price and blinked. _That's nearly all the money I have on me right now! How-?_ He turned slowly to face the mountain of empty bowls that confirmed the harsh truth. Shisui could hear the figurative crying of his poor, poor wallet as he handed over a wad of bills.

* * *

A poof of smoke appeared out of Maki's large empty ramen bowl. A webbed hand poked out of the clearing smoke and waved about.

"Aye Maki-chan. Jiraiya told me to give this to you," the colorful toad held out his other hand. He was holding a big stack of ryo. "This is supposed to start you off until you start taking your own missions. Hokage-sama also got you a place to live at. 15 Yoshi Apt. 6. Bye!" The toad rapid-fired spoke before canceling his own summoning.

Naruto was literally vibrating on his stool from excitement. He began to wave his arms around in the air as he yelled, "We're neighbors, Maki-neesan! Neighbors!" He jumped out of his seat and began prancing about. "Think of all the pranks we can plan and you're a shinobi. You can train me. You'll be the sensei of the greatest Hokage ever!"

* * *

Maki, Shisui, and Naruto stood in front of the sad-looking wooden door. It was painted a pretty blue color but with all the wear and tear on the it, it looked nothing but forlorn. Maki put on a brave face and grasped the doorknob. Turning it, she heard the door give an ominous creak.

"Uh...nothing a little grease can't fix?" she tried to suggest optimistically before stepping into the darkness of the apartment. Her hand fumbled against the wall as she tried to find a light switch to flip. "Aha!" with a small, victorious cry, the lights flickered on. The three of them stood in the entranceway; their shinobi-trained eyes tracking the movement of a large spider crawling on the floor. It was a huge, grotesque thing and Naruto screamed in disgust. Maki flung a shuriken at it in a knee-jerk reaction. "Ahhhhh! So gross!" Spider guts splattered on the floor and Maki grimaced at the thought of having to clean it.

With the spider dealt with, her eyes explored the rest of the room. The door opened up to a small living room, dusty and dirty with nothing but a rickety table and two equally rickety wooden chairs. The front right of the living room opened up to a tiny kitchen. The appliances and kitchen tools looked rusty and not very sanitary. A sole lightbulb dangled precariously from the ceiling. Shisui walked over to stand underneath it and prodded it gently. The lightbulb shook from the motion and lit up. "What? I didn't even flip the switch."

To the left of the kitchen there was a short hallway with three doors. Maki and Naruto opened the first door on the right. A bathroom greeted their eyes. Old and yellowed with age, the bathroom looked moldy and rusted. A centipede stopped its ascent up the bathroom wall. Naruto slammed the door shut. "Ne, Maki-neesan, I think your bathroom is a little gross. Why don't you use mine for now?"

"That's a kind offer, Naruto. I'll take you up on it."

Shisui rejoined them with a grim smile. "You have a fearsome battle ahead of you, Maki-chan. I wish you the best of luck." He saluted the two blondes before attempting to hightail out of the nightmarish apartment.

"Not so quickly, Shisui-kun. You're gonna help me aren't you? How could you leave a poor lady and child to fend for themselves?" Maki retorted as she grabbed ahold of Shisui's sleeve. The male stopped with a jerk. "There are still two more doors to explore and we're gonna do it together."

The next door on the right revealed a shelved closet. Naruto opened that door and was attacked by a swarm of moths. Apparently, the last tenant had left some clothes in the closet and it had festered with the creatures.

Maki maneuvered herself behind Shisui, shoving Naruto behind her. She placed both palms flat on her back and pushed Shisui forward. "Open the door for us. It's your turn."

Shisui gulped but did so. He turned the knob and gave the door a hesitant push. He quickly stepped back, herding the girl and boy behind him back, as the door creaked open. Sunlight poured into the room. The wooden flooring was unevenly colored, some patches lighter than others. _Sunlight bleaching_ , Maki deduced. It was surprisingly the cleanest of all the rooms in the apartment. No monstrous sight revealed itself to them. The only thing in the room aside from some dust bunnies was a rumpled futon thrown in a corner of the room. The light fixture seemed fine, the window was uncracked, the ceilings and walls not decorated by the sights of large insects.

The three all let out relieved sighs until they heard rustling. Maki was the first to hear it with her enhanced senses. She turned slowly to face the futon. Whiskers twitched in the air. A wet nose sniffed the air. Two beady black eyes stared into two blue eyes. Two dark eyes and another pair of blue eyes followed the line of contact into the corner. Naruto was the first to respond. He shrieked before running out of the bedroom, down the hallway and out of the apartment. The creature was next to respond. It hurtled out of the futon and scampered out of the room, leaving rat droppings scattering from its nest.

"Disgusting!" Maki snarled as she hurled another shuriken at the giant pest.

 **AN: Ruka- Well Tsukiko and I are done with college apps now. And we're making an attempt to write better. Writing. Disgusting. We also plundered Bath and Body Works.**

 **Tsuki- Thank goodness. I don't think I could write another college essay blegh. Thanks to everyone who's still sticking with us, old and new!**


End file.
